Camp Writing E-Portfolio

Motivation:

Camp Experiences

Learning Objectives:

Level 3

• Show a developing understanding of how to shape texts for different purposes and audiences.
• Select, form, and communicate ideas on a range of topics.
• Use language features appropriately, showing a developing understanding of their effects.
• Organise texts, using a range of appropriate structures.

Level 4

• Show an increasing understanding of how to shape texts for different purposes and audiences.
• Select, develop, and communicate ideas on a range of topics.
• Use a range of language features appropriately, showing an increasing understanding of their effects.
• Organise texts. Using a range of appropriate structures.

Learning goals:

• To hook the reader in with an interesting beginning
• A variety of sentence starters
• A variety of sentence lengths
• Edit and rework
• Effective peer checking and feedback

As we had slowly started the blind trail my first couple of steps had already made me cautiously frightened of what we were up against.

Step by step I would hold the rope tightly with out even letting go. By knowing what my team mates were saying I knew what was coming. A few times I walked into a tree and over branch. It was fun at least. Once I was following Kiriama and she held a few branches and let it go. Sadly that roughly wacked me in the face. My face was all hurt but overall I had a fantastic time to make new memories to remember as a year 8.

As we continued strolling in the forest sometime we had to go down low holes and around trees because of the path we had to follow. I suddenly lost the rope and didn't know what to do. So I panicked and loudly shouted out to a parent to come direct me back on track.The funnest part was when we had to climb around and over huge logs and branches. I kept on hearing weird noises coming from around us.

We continued the blind trail as we nearly came to a dead end. Kiriama was in front of me and Talula behind. As we exited the trail everyone was chatting loudly about how cool and amazing that trail was. Everyone had so much fun.

Teacher Comment:
Elenoa, you have used an interesting hook to get the reader interested in your writing. I like your choice of words when describing the blind trail and the image you have created with words. The way you have set your writing out into paragraphs shows an understanding of control over your ideas. Your next step is to continue to recraft your writing.